Tag: Family

God’s Will for My Family

bette / / Politics, Religion

I shouldn’t be shocked by yesterday’s Supreme Court Decision – but it has stirred something deep in me and I feel like I’m in some sort of a time warp. I have been careful about when, and with whom, to share my own story, but now I know I need to speak out

 

In February 2017 my best friend from high school sent me a link to The Atlantic that was asking for personal stories from women who had undergone abortions. Marle encouraged me to write and send my story. So I did.

It was not published in the on-line “Notes” section with the other stories. Instead, Chris Bodenner, the editor of the piece, wrote me a personal email. He was obviously a lot younger than I was at the time because he told me that he had no idea that German measles  could cause birth defects. As he wrote in his article, the concern at that time was the Zika virus – so he did some research.

What he told me was that the German measles epidemic I wrote about started in 1965, and that by 1970 abortions FOR CASES OF GERMAN MEASLES were no longer illegal.

After writing my article and sharing it with my brother, he remembered what he was doing in 1971. His job was in Admitting at Arcadia Methodist Hospital. He had been told that if a doctor wrote “TA” on the form, he was to admit the woman – but not to ask about the abbreviation

 

In 1971 I was a practicing Evangelical Christian, and having been raised in a sheltered environment, I had never even heard the word “abortion.” I had no idea what the “therapeutic abortion” that my obstetrician was recommending was all about. He tried to explain that time was of the essence, but, as I explain in my article, my family and I needed time to seek council and to pray. So we did. We didn’t realize what pushing the procedure into my second trimester would actually mean …

 

Yesterday’s Supreme court decision caused me to revisit Chris Bodenner’s article which contains a somewhat edited version of my story:

Abortion as a ‘Technology from God to Prevent Suffering’

 

Reading it again … I’m not sure that I would make the same decision today – but the past cannot be rewritten, and it remains my truth. My decision to have an abortion – even as a married woman – was mine and mine alone. To this day I’m glad that I sought council from trusted friends and family – but the ultimate choice was mine.

 

_____________________________________

Below is the text of the entire article I sent to Chris Bodenner:

 

GOD’S WILL FOR MY FAMILY

February 2017

 

In March 1971 I had a second trimester saline solution injection abortion.    I was a Christian, married, and 24 years old.  My husband and I celebrated my pregnancy with friends on Thanksgiving Day in 1970 and, although it was a bit of a surprise, we were delighted.

I was teaching fifth grade at the time and will never forget the moment when a student walked up to my desk and said he didn’t feel very well. When I saw the rash on his face, I flashed back to a terrible photograph I had seen in a magazine in my obstetrician’s office the week before.  It was of a “Rubella baby” … and the caption said “Bobby’s mother recovered from German measles in 3 days.  Bobby wasn’t so lucky.”

I didn’t know exactly what that meant, but I later found out.  I learned that the reason they finally connected Rubella with birth defects was that delivery room personnel were coming down with German measles 2-3 weeks after the birth of a baby with severe birth defects.   Although the mother recovers in three days, sadly, the baby stays sick throughout the remaining time of gestation and is still contagious at birth.

 

I had almost forgotten about that student and the magazine picture a couple of weeks later when got up and saw a very slight rash on my own face.  I covered it up with make-up as best I could and drove 30 miles to school … feeling worse and worse the whole way.  Half way through the morning I couldn’t deny what was happening to me and I cried all the way home.  When I called my doctor he specifically told me not to come in.  He knew what was wrong and told me to go to bed and that I’d feel better in a couple of days.

My husband was in the Army at the time and we felt that we needed to go home in order to have support from our family, our church, and the doctor I trusted.   My doctor told us about a “therapeutic abortion.”  As a naive Christian girl I had never heard the word “abortion.”  This was before Rowe vs. Wade and I had no idea what was going on in “Women’s Lib” circles at the time.

The reason this was a second trimester abortion was that my Christian family had never faced anything like this before. We were blindsided by the news and needed time to come to grips with what was happening.  I wanted to talk to church leaders I trusted. Although my doctor told me about the difference between a simple first trimester D&C and a second trimester saline solution injection, he explained it very gently.  He told me that he couldn’t give me advice, but if it were his wife he would encourage her to have the abortion.

Then we turned to our church.  My aunt and uncle were missionaries in Taiwan at that time, but they were home on furlough.  As a missionary nurse, my aunt agreed with my parents’ Sunday school teacher who was the Chief of Cardiac Surgery at a major hospital in Southern California.   They all agreed that this was within God’s will.  They told me that this was a “technology that God has given us in order to prevent more suffering in the world.”  On their advice I went ahead with the abortion.

 

Although I seldom talk about my abortion, I have spent a lot of years being very angry with Christians who make a political issue out of something so deeply personal and spiritual as this was for me.  I spent precious time talking with my Christian support system as I was making one of the hardest decisions of my life.  I have left that church now because I don’t believe that God “changed Her mind.”   That is the little throw-away line that I used to mask my rage at Christians …. Christian MEN in particular who want to have a say in a decision that is between a woman and her God.  The way I was able to find peace was in knowing that I sent that little guy, Tory Cameron, back home to be with God.

I look at it the same way now. The suffering that abortion alleviates in the world is the mess we have created because we haven’t figured out a way to take care of the children who are already here. Every story is different … but what the “pro-life” crowd doesn’t want to consider is the fact that abortion is never going to go away.  Never, that is, until we figure out a way to prevent unwanted pregnancies.  Sometimes that can be a young girl living in poverty who has no way to support a child. Or it is a mother addicted to drugs whose baby will be born addicted and possibly severely damaged.  And then there are the young girls who are so afraid that their families would disown them that they take matters into their own hands and risk the tragic consequences.

Bottom line, NO ONE thinks abortion is a good thing.  I don’t know what my life would have been like if I had carried Tory to full term, but I do know that it would have been different.  I wouldn’t have the two children I have.  My marriage may or may not have ended earlier … or we might have lived “happily ever after” with a beautiful, handicapped child who we both would have loved.

But I do know two things for sure: First, the decision was mine, and mine alone, to make. And second, I will someday be reunited with Tory and we’ll talk about it then.  That’s when I will apologize … if necessary.

 

__________________________

This is the reply I received from after submitting my story to The Atlantic/notes

 

At 01:29 PM 2/6/2017, Chris Bodenner wrote:

Thanks so much for writing in, Bette. I’ve read, edited, and posted countless stories of abortion over the years, but this is the first time I’ve heard of German measles causing such perilous complications. learned a lot just reading this short piece:

Infectious Diseases: Rubella Vaccines

So thank you again for sharing such a personal and powerful story, especially on an aspect we haven’t covered yet. We’ll most certainlypost your story soon, but I’m curious: What did you mean by “Now I know what was going on and that’s part of my story that I could write later”? Would you like to share?

Best regards, Chris

[Note: I read my story and realized that “part of my story” was not essential – so Chris used what he felt was important and posted my story within one of his own – focusing first on the Zika virus.]

 

Can we talk?

bette / / Parenting on Purpose, Politics

My father died in 1992 at the age of 71. He was a wonderful Christian, husband, and father . . .  in that order.  To the best of his ability he tried to understand the teachings of Jesus and to live his life accordingly.

I was my father’s greatest disappointment.

 

It’s not that I’m not a Christian – I am.  It’s just that as a little child I had questions that I knew I wasn’t suppose to ask.  So I didn’t.  On the rare occasion that I was able to muster the courage to ask, I was usually told that some things we had to “take on faith” . . .  or that those answers are in God’s hands. Some of those same questions resulted in my leaving Evangelical Christianity in 1982.

As a result, when my father died – when I was 47 years old – my questions remained unanswered . . . because I had never asked.

 

After he died I did, however, make a list. I called that list “Conversations with my dad.”  It’s basically just a list of questions and the imaginary conversations I wish we could have had.

 

I revisited that list today.  It’s actually not all that long – but the questions have still not been answered. Even though I am close to many Evangelical Christians, I still don’t feel like I can ask them.

 

My father called himself a “Fundamental, Evangelical Christian.”  I’m not sure when Evangelicals stopped describing themselves that way, but my guess is it was when the results of Muslim Fundamentalism became obvious on September 11, 2001.   Even so, every Evangelical church insists that the entire Bible MUST be interpreted literally.

I won’t even begin to go into what that must continue to do to little children who, like me, have questions. I don’t think they are any longer given lists of acceptable questions and made to memorize Bible verses out of context as the acceptable answers. My guess is that, like me, they just know what they can talk about and what they can’t.

 

The reason I started writing this post is because I just finished listening to the House of Representatives debate whether or not to impeach Donald Trump.  They voted yes … and now history is going to unfold around that decision. As I listened, I felt like the two “sides” were living on two different planets rather than just on two different sides of an aisle.

 

Almost 20 years after his death I have come to understand my father. His convictions served him well during his lifetime, and his legacy has lived on in the hundreds – if not thousands – of people who benefited from his Christ-like example.  He followed Jesus – and even left a church he loved over an issue that was never explained to me, but that involved the dismissal of a choir director.

My father believed that God = Love.  Where there is Love there is God. I truly believe that my dad would be heart-broken today.

 

I saw a very large, yellow sign proclaiming “JESUS SAVES” in the front of the mob that overran the Capitol of the United States one week ago today.

I don’t understand.

 

I have started a new list:  “Conversations I hope to have with my Evangelical family an/or friends.”

 

Is that possible?

Can we talk?

 

 

A Vision Dimmed

bette / / Growing Leaders, PORTFOLIO

As I write, I am listening to a teacher’s voice, on-line, conducting a live lesson intended to prepare a group of homeschooled fourth graders for their state testing.  These children have been pulled out of the public school system for many reasons.  Some are the children of free-spirited parents who are raising their children on their own terms; some are the children of parents who don’t want their children exposed to what they see as the evils in society; and some have parents who honestly believe that they can do a better job than can professional educators.  But the child I tutor is unique.

But wait a minute!  All children are unique!  Christopher, however, has had experiences that have made it impossible for him to survive in a traditional classroom.  When it comes right down to it, my take on the situation is that he’s simply brighter than the adults who have authority over him.  Not “smarter” . . . not better informed . . . simply brighter.  His mind works faster.  He processes information in ways that his teachers cannot understand.  His talents are not only not supported by the system, they are seen as downright disruptive.  He is an individual.  And as a particularly strong individual – at 10 years old – he won’t let the system force him into a mold that does not fit.

So here I sit.  Listening to a recording in which a well-meaning teacher, a disembodied voice, is trying to calm the fears of a group of silent children, spread all over the state, so they will perform on the state test in a manner that will reflect well on the on-line school.

 

When I left classroom teaching in 1998, I did not see this coming.  There were those, however, who did – and warned the rest of us that we in the public schools would need to improve our “customer service” in order to remain competitive.  Parents were beginning to see that curriculum was becoming more and more standardized, the levels of stress and anxiety felt by adults in the system was causing stress and anxiety in their children, and ideas like “school choice,” “innovative and flexible charter schools,” and “home schooling” were making them question whether or not the public schools were best serving the needs of their children.

Even though I knew it was time for me to leave the classroom, I was fully aware that I was not ready to leave education.  I had the opportunity to help write a National Blue Ribbon Award application for the school where I had been teaching, and I was excited about the possibilities for education in the coming years.  I wanted to consult and write    . . .  and I believed that my voice could make a difference.

So, for the first time in my 30-year career as an educator, I began attending state and national educational conferences.  I soon became aware of what President G.W. Bush had called the “Decade of the Brain.”  It seemed to me that we were on the brink of a transformation that would positively impact education, society, and all future generations of learners.  It was an exciting time for me.  I had wonderful memories of my years of teaching, a beautiful vision for the future – and lots of time on my hands.

Over the next few years I attended conferences and workshops, bought books, and  became familiar with the ideas of educators like Phil Schlechty, Eric Jensen, Bill Spady, Geoffrey and Renate Caine, Bob Sylwester, Robin Fogarty, Alphie Kohn, Marion Diamond, Spencer Kagan, Carla Hannaford, and many, many more. Their ideas inspired me to work with others who believed as I did that we were on the brink of true educational reform.

In 2001 I had the opportunity to work with some truly enlightened people on an educational model that was not only learner centered – but held at its core a deep respect for the child at the spiritual and emotional levels.  That model was designed to encourage creativity, collaboration, and compassion in learners while developing competence in the concepts and skills they would need as productive members of society.  In addition – and most important – was our focus on helping children become truly conscious of who they really are and the people they are becoming.  For almost three years we were well funded by a visionary entrepreneur and our excitement ran high.  Three schools on two continents were established and we all truly believed that the HeartLight model would transform education.

Unfortunately, our schools in this country had to close after the first year because they were not fully self-supporting.  But did we fail? Or were we simply premature?  I believe that in time, others will wake up to the reality that our children are more than what a test can measure.  Models like ours will then begin to attract enough families (and entrepreneurs) to make them “cost effective.”  (Which, we must admit, is the bottom line for any venture like this.)

After the HeartLight Learning Communities were closed, another opportunity came my way.  This time I worked with a forward-thinking superintendent who helped me apply for a grant to start a charter school in our small community.  Believing that any rational human being would realize that the best way to educate children is to honor the way they naturally learn, I set off to write the HeartLight model in language that would be accepted by traditional educators. At that time (2003) the criteria for such schools in our state were that they be innovative and flexible, community driven, and provide opportunities not available in the local public school system. Our grant was funded and Upper Chetco Charter School opened in September 2005 with 25 students, two teachers, and a great many excited community volunteers.  But once again, the model was premature, our timing wrong – and within six months of opening, the newly hired staff fell back into a traditional, standardized, one-size-fits-all curriculum.  Our dream of bringing an enlightened model of education to our little town was gone.

Disappointment ran high for those of us who were so committed to both of those projects.   During the years that have followed public education has moved in an entirely different direction – even farther away from our dream.  But I still don’t believe that either of these ventures failed.    It sometimes feels to me like our vision has dimmed – but then I realize that the people who worked with us, the minds we opened, and the children we inspired will take what they learned, make it their own, and continue the journey toward a better future for themselves – and perhaps even for the world.

 

Reflections on Voices and Values – June 4, 1999

bette / / Growing Leaders, Parenting on Purpose, PORTFOLIO

Even though I wrote “Breakfast at McDonald’s:Reflections on Voices and Values” in 1999, I still remember the thoughts that were running through my mind that day like it was yesterday.  I don’t think I ever shared it with anyone except Molly’s mother because I felt like it was too negative, too pessimistic.  I felt that I was being too critical

As I read it now I realize that the situation has become exponentially worse in the past 16 years. Children learn from the experiences and the models we provide for them. I shudder as I think about our candidates for the President of the United States as their role models.  What kind of leaders can we expect them to become?  How can we fault them for disrespectful language and behavior when that’s what they see every night on the news?

I also wonder about the young people who are being “radicalized” by ISIS.  Has anyone stopped to think about where they were, or what they were doing in 1999 when Molly was so disappointed because the Beanie Babies at McDonald’s had all been gobbled up by toy collectors?  At least Molly was surrounded by a family and friends who cared about her and made her feel like she was an important part of her community. She was not one of the “Invisible Kids” who turn to violence to be noticed – or to feel like they belong.  What kind of role models did they have when they were 10 years old?

Why are we surprised that when we model greed and violence that we get greed and violence?

 

All I really have are questions … but as I read where my mind was the day I wrote this, the more concerned about what our children are seeing and hearing these days   . . .

 

Breakfast at McDonald’s: Reflections on Voices and Values

 

NOTE: These links in the footnotes don’t work in the PDF:

“Joe Camel”

Bye Bye Birdie

Violent Video Games

 

A Poem for Olivia – Jan. 29, 2014

bette / / Parenting on Purpose, Pillar of Fire, PORTFOLIO

I wrote this poem the day after my daughter called to tell us that she was pregnant.  On January 28, 2014 and we were in our RV at Lake Cahuilla in La Quinta, California.  The news came as a shock for many reasons, and I’m afraid that my tone on the phone was not one of delight.  I think Shannon understood and gave me the time I needed to adjust to the unexpected situation.

 

I don’t consider myself a poet, but the attached story explains why I wrote this one.  I have revised the poem twice.  The first time was when Shannon and Jeff decided to name their daughter Olivia.   The second revision was made a couple of weeks after Olivia was born when I realized that the hope I had felt the morning I wrote it had turned to pure joy.

 

CLICK HERE:

For Olivia (Story and Poem)

For Olivia

Comments on For Olivia

EMOTIONAL LADDER

 

Parenting on Purpose – March 1998

bette / / Parenting on Purpose, PORTFOLIO

I wrote this piece during Spring Break in 1998 just after meeting my first nephew, Tanner.  Tanner was 6 months old.  Less than a month ago, on May 27, 2016, I got to watch Tanner giving the Salutatorian address at Oakmont High School in Roseville, CA.  He’s off to Cal Tech in the fall … and who knows after that?

The last time I was at a service in the Quad at Oakmont High was in 1993 at the Celebration of Life for Tanner’s mom, Ginger.  It was a pretty amazing experience for me to watch Tanner speaking from the very same podium where Larry Leatherman spoke about the sort of person and mother that Ginger had been.  I know that she was there in spirit, loving every minute of it …

 

Parenting on Purpose – Tanner Moore

Notes on the Moore Family

 

TANNER’S SPEECH (5 minutes)

 

Focus on the Children – December 1998

bette / / Growing Leaders, Parenting on Purpose

Jesus says nothing about focusing on the family.  In fact, he said quite the opposite.  A quick Google search for the question “What did Jesus say about family?” led me to pages and pages of sites that try to dispel the literal interpretation of Luke 14:22-27 where He says we must “hate” our family to be His disciple. Mostly they explain His words away by saying they must be taken within the context of the time and place.

I most definitely agree with that.  I don’t think Jesus ever meant us to hate anyone – particularly not our family. But I also believe that He never meant for that to be our focus.  He did, however, talk a lot about children … and it could certainly be argued that our focus should be on them.

 

When I hear people talking about the abuses they suffered in their homes as children, I become very angry. Sometimes I feel like I should step in when I hear how someone is talking to her own child in a supermarket.  It’s even hard for me to go into elementary classrooms these days and watch the faces of many of the children who are absolutely overwhelmed by the amount of information they are supposed to process and to regurgitate by filling in little bubbles in test booklets.

 

I think that these “random thoughts” bubbled up today because I’ve been thinking about my own childhood and how it has influenced me as a parent and as a teacher.  As I thought about what I wanted to write, I realized that I already wrote it in 1998:

Are You Listening

 

Leadership 2020

bette / / Growing Leaders

The children who were the focus for Leadership 2020 when I began writing about them in 1997 are no longer children.  Their children will soon take their places, and the efforts that were being made 15 years ago to replace a one-size-fits-all school system with one that would support the uniqueness of each individual child have fallen on deaf ears.

That thought occurred to me this morning because I’m visiting my grandchildren.  They are just about the same age as those kids in my class in 1997.  When the phrase “Leadership 2020” crossed my mind for the first time in August 1997, I was on my way home from vacation to teach another year of 4th and 5th grade.  As it turned out, that was to be my last year in the classroom.

I listened to two audio books on that trip home, and together they changed my life.  Joseph Jawarski’s, Synchronicity: The Inner Path of Leadership opened my mind to the fact that the children in my class would turn 30 in the year 2020. As I thought about when my kids would assume positions of leadership, I realized that the President of the United States only has to be 35 years old!

Daniel Goleman’s Emotional Intelligence: Why It Can Matter More then I.Q. made me realize that if those young adults were going to have the skills necessary to move into positions of leadership, we should be creating learning environments within which they could practice those skills.

That idea took over my mind, and a year later, through a series of unexpected, but synchronous events, I found myself leaving classroom teaching, moving to a different state, and focusing on a vision that I thought would impact the future of public education.

So now, here I sit, 15 years later, only 5 years before what I thought to be the “target date”  for Leadership 2020, wondering what went wrong.

 

The answer?  Nothing went wrong.  The children of the generation that was dubbed “Gen X” in the 1990’s has given birth to a generation that we are calling “Millennials” … who, in turn, are beginning to have children that one writer is calling the generation of “Homelanders.”

 

Systemic change does not happen overnight.  In fact, true systemic change does not even happen in one generation.  It occurred to me this morning that my son – and the children who were in my last 5th grade class – are now becoming the parents, teachers, and leaders who are questioning the restrictive one-size-fits-all school structures.  And what is even more interesting to me is that they are not necessarily railing against them; some have simply decided that they want something different for their own children and have chosen homeschooling, charter schools, or if they can afford it, private schools.  Others are becoming more involved and are seeking ways to improve the system from within.

The house is quiet now.  My son has taken 6th grade Mason to middle school.  My daughter-in-law took 1st grade Miles and 4th grade Reese to school and will be a substitute teacher there today.  And I have time to think.

Sometimes I talk about “20/20 hindsight.” That’s when I look back and think “if only I had done things differently.”  I need to stop those thoughts as soon as I become aware that I’m going down that path again.  It’s fine to learn from the past … but it is not fine to live there and regret decisions made or roads not taken.  Instead I need to step back – consider the larger picture – and envision a future when the children of the children of the kids in my class in 1998 are in charge.

We have a choice.  We can let fear color our thoughts and dim our vision, or we can look into the faces of our grandchildren, encourage their sometimes faltering or misguided attempts at leadership, and help them fully develop their own unique potential.

 

RELATED LINKS: Homelanders Part 1: FORBES       Homelanders Part 2: FORBES

 

Resolutions in Retrospect

bette / / Learning to Write / Writing to Learn, PORTFOLIO

It’s New Year’s Day 2015, and if I made any resolutions a year ago I’m sure I didn’t keep them.  That’s not surprising because I realized a long time ago that it works best for me to write my resolutions at the end of the year instead of at the beginning. If I had made a New Year’s Resolution on Jan. 1, 2014  I’m sure it would have had something to do with writing.  I probably would have said that I would focus on one thing at a time and stop “meandering” so much.

Looking back, however, I realize that’s just not going to happen. In fact, as I look back over 2014 I realize that my “resolution in retrospect” would be that I would ease up on myself.  I wrote in an earlier post that I write because it’s fun – and that’s what I’m going to continue doing in 2015 … and just enjoy where it takes me.

That said … I had a lot of fun this past week putting together an illustrated New Year’s letter.  I want to post it now because for the first time since I’ve been doing this I’ve actually finished it on New Year’s Day!

CLICK HERE:   2015 Letter

Pillar of Fire: A Myth?

bette / / Pillar of Fire

When my daughter was 17 years old, we began talking about writing a book together.  Several years later – after she had failed in many attempts to become sober – we returned to the idea of writing a book together and begin calling it Pillar of Fire:  A Journey through Teenage Addiction.   Shannon is now 34 years old and is approaching her 6th “AA Birthday” as a clean and sober recovering alcoholic – and I couldn’t be prouder!

 

We continue talking about “our book” every time we’re together.  I recently returned to the two large file boxes that contain all of the notes and documents that mark the steps along the painful and bumpy road to her recovery.  I often ask myself why I keep it all – and why I keep returning to it.  Every time the answer comes back to the mythical book and the Pillar of Fire.

 

Last week I ran across a copy of a short article that Shannon showed me when she was 28 years old and in her last rehab experience at Singing Trees in Garberville, CA.  (www.singingtreesrecovery.com).  She first showed it to me when she had been sober for less than a month.  That wasn’t really unusual because after each of her 5 previous experiences in rehab, she would accumulate a certain length of time sober before drinking again.  What was unusual about this time was her excitement over finding this article. (Attached below.)

 

When I read it for the first time the story seemed a bit far fetched.  I also wondered why, if it were true, I hadn’t heard of it before – especially in my training as a school counselor . . .  not to mention in the family groups we had attended in various rehab hospitals along the way.  But sensing her excitement, I was certainly not about to ask any questions.

 

As I was rereading my only copy of that article, I decided it was important enough to retype so that I could include it in “our” book.  So that’s what I’ve been doing today.  Once again, however, I began wondering why I had not heard more about it since it seemed to have been the “magic bullet” my daughter needed in order to kick her habit.

 

So . . . I used Google and found out why.  At first it bothered me to find out that the theory had been discredited by the scientific community, and I almost stopped typing it about half-way through.  After reading about “THIQ – The Biochemical Culprit” on a “myth-busting” website, however . . . I began thinking about Joseph Campbell’s book The Power of Myth  . . .  and I continued typing.

 

A myth is a story that helps human beings understand things that are otherwise impossible to understand.  That was the basis of the “myths” we were taught in school that were held by civilizations that we consider unscientific.  It’s also the basis for the stories that illustrate the deep truths held by all religions today.

 

I believe that a belief is simply a “decision to act ‘as if.’”  People who hold onto the literal interruption of the stories contained in any sacred text can sometimes fall prey to the need to “prove” their belief system “scientifically.”   A lifetime can be spent trying to convince others that they are “right,” and they can miss out on the deeper truths and the power held within any “myth.”

 

The THIQ explanation of Alcoholism helped save my daughter’s life.  At a time when she was the most vulnerable – even close to insanity and/or death – she found the “truth” in what others have discredited as not true.  After 6 years of sobriety I wonder if she knows about the “Mythbuster” webpage http://hamsnetwork.org/myths/ .  I also wonder if it would matter to her at all.

 

It seems to me that if used properly, these 10 myths might serve to help alcoholics who want sobriety to find it.  “Choose your myth and decide to act ‘as if’ it is true.”  That’s what Shannon did – and she’s got 6 years of sobriety and a license as an addiction counselor to “prove” it works.

 

That’s scientific enough for me!

 

NOTE: After writing this post I found myself wondering about research that has been discredited.  I recently read about another piece of “discredited research” in The Brain that Changes Itself, by Norman Doige. He describes research on macaque monkeys that was once discredited but later found to be important in the field of neuroplasticity.  When I got past internet articles about the “Harm Reduction” technique (The Minnesota Alternative) –  I found references to newer “legitimate research” in the field of addiction medicine.  One article suggests that “models of the neurochemical bases of addiction in the future may also feature lowered levels of GABA as the disease progresses.”  The author of that article is continuing to explore the implications of THIQ and cites recent reports that “cigarette smoke also may contribute increased levels of THIQ in the thalamus which has been reported to remain in the brains of addicted macaques for up to 7 years post-last use.” [1]

What I believe to be true is that there are as many causes of alcoholism as there are alcoholics – and probably an equal number of treatments and combinations of treatments. Human behavior is not an exact science, and the science of addiction is in its infancy.  It’s impossible to predict what the future may hold, so I’m slow to discredit anything that “works if you work it.”

THE DISEASE CONCEPT OF ALCOHOLISM